For some time, I have been pursuing the oft elusive but highly desirable multi-orgasmic, non-ejaculating orgasm. I’ve had times in the past where I rode the crest of an orgasm lasting minutes. There has also been a time when, while performing oral sex, I’ve had an orgasm without ejaculating. Let’s just define this now that ‘orgasm’ means an orgasm without my ejaculating. ‘Ejaculating’ will mean a nice big spurty mess of goo.
Unfortunately, I haven’t studied and practiced enough to be able to do it all the time. Fortunately, I haven’t studied and practiced enough to be able to do it all the time. Let me explain.
Right now, it’s such a beautifully intense surprise when it does happen that I relish when it comes around. But then, it IS so rare that I’d like to see it come around more. In the past couple weeks (since my last period of denial started some 23 days ago) I started getting close to it. Several times I’ve felt it coming on. Sometimes it turns into an ejaculation, so I stop completely. Other times I just get up to some form of plateau stage before orgasm and sit there, frustratingly so. I try to cycle the energy around, but the circle doesn’t turn. Something blocks it from becoming bigger. I end up with this entirely frustrating “oh so close” period that lasts for minutes. Given that Chloe really enjoys teasing me and denying me, this thrills her! To see my frustration, to see in my pleading eyes the hunger to just go one more nudge to go over into the orgasm side, as if there was something she could do to help me, reflects her smile at me, delighting in my frustration. One time recently, without even outright touching me for stimulation, though lying next to me in bed, her words pushed me toward orgasm, but only up to the plateau where I tried in vain to find that last step up. A big great big landing with a terrifying view, but no last step up.
Well, this morning I found it. We were talking about “It’s like having perfect sex” and while I was describing to her what I thought that might be, I was able to push myself up to orgasm. I grabbed her tightly, shuddered multiple times, grabbed her multiple times, trying not to hurt her with the intensity of my grip and had this great big wonderful beautiful orgasm. It shook me from head to toe and filled me up. And yet, once I broke that, breathed, slowed and came back down, I was still rock hard, still greatly aroused and incredibly passionate toward my beautiful lover and partner.
Orgasm. The kind I want is sometimes hard to find, but it’s a beautiful thing when I do find it.