Never…

Last night, we made time to play together in bed. We had been out and about doing our own thing yesterday, came together in the middle of the day and then made our own little pub crawl, visiting three breweries/restaurants yesterday afternoon and evening. Settling into our nest of a bedroom, we watched a little TV and then started playing. It was one of those nights where we struggled for control. She incited me and I pinned her arms. I fucked her while I did this. She has trouble talking when I do it, which is more than half the fun. Soon she wrested control back and she was using me. My cock was too ready to explode, so I finished her with one of our most favorite dildos, fucking her very hard with it until she came.

You know when you have a bucket that is just full to the top? And you try and move that bucket? It’s going to spill, you’re aware of it, you know it, but just because it’s a bucket, it’s going to spill. The cock spilled too, as the balls are so very full, overfull. It was a beautiful lubricant for me to finish her with the dildo, but she insisted that she be cleaned up again after. She stroked me while I did so. Three more times I needed her to stop while she did so to prevent the bucket from being knocked clean over.

Then while lying beside her, she held tightly to my cock and balls while she talked to me. “That was nice, but what am I going to do with that cock of mine? It can’t fuck me the way I want.” She stroked her cock slowly. “It just seems you can’t useĀ  your cock on me the way I need it.” She squeezed my balls. “I like your begging. I really do. I love watching your face as you struggle.” She stroked my cock again.

“But struggle all you want. And beg all you want. You’re not going to cum.” She released my cock and rolled over on her side, her back toward me. “Pet me to sleep, slave.”

“Yes, Ma’am” I whimpered.

She continued talking. “I really do love using you, it’s fun. But I can get myself off without you. And you’ve already showed that your cock isn’t useful enough to me. But you never would have handled my pussy squeezing that cock. You would have spilled.” I pet her back and shoulders. “But you don’t have to worry about spilling that cum, love. I’m just not going to let you. There’s just no reason for you to cum, ever again.”

I don't do caption photos, but this one seems to accurate. I just have to.

I don’t do caption photos, but this one seems to accurate. I just have to.

Ever again. EVER. AGAIN. It echoed in my head, my eyes welled up. I stroked her lower back and butt. I sobbed into the pillow. She spoke slowly and quietly. Each sentence with a pause at the end of it. A pause so that I could hear the echo of the hammer that just pounded that nail.

“No pup, there’s just no reason for it.

I don’t need it,

so it won’t be happening again.”

I sobbed into my pillow again.

“You know pup, it seems a shame that we never officially said good bye to your cumming.

We should have a ceremony, where we say good bye to your cumming forever.

We’ll have lots of friends and we’ll have a ceremony so all these friends of ours can say good bye to your cumming too.

That might be helpful to you, a ceremony to say good bye.”

She never indicated that I’d have a last cum during that ceremony, but I implied it, perhaps inaccurately. I humped my body against hers. She continued her slow methodical phrase by phrase talking.

“Go ahead, hump into me if you want,

push that hard cock into me,

but it’s not going to cum.

It doesn’t ever need to cum again.

Don’t worry, there will be cum for you.

It just won’t be yours.

It’ll be on your face,

you can lap it up off my tits,

and maybe if you’re very good,

out of my pussy.”

I rubbed her back and she fell asleep. I stopped humping against her and sobbed into my pillow, then fell asleep shortly after her.


She teased me again around 2:30 in the morning, using me for a little while, but then her talk of “ever again” came up, and I almost came, and she was done with me and put me back to bed.

This morning she told me “Last night was a lot of fun. I really enjoyed it.” I smiled. She saw my cock rise under the sheets. “You had fun too…” she looked down at me. I nodded at her. “I know, pup.” She grabbed my cock through the sheets. “I know.”

“I don’t last long when you talk about that, you know.”

She smiled. “I was only speaking the truth last night. Nothing but the truth.” She pumped my cock one or two times and stood up again from the bed. “Get up now and write about it, pup.”

And so I’ve written about it. And I’ve set this post to show up in a little while, after I’m at work and have stopped thinking about those words “ever again”. I’m still not sure whether it’s real or not. And I think that’s exactly what she expects.

Will another fantasy become reality?

Continuing to make time for blogging… Let me relate a story from last week. I had a little idle time at the office – time where I can’t really leave where I’m at, but not really time to work on any other project. It happens where I get stuck in a chair for 18 minutes, but can’t leave. So, onto my phone I go and wander through my porn feed or I might check out Craigslist. And that’s where I saw this:

I am visiting 7/11 to 7/14 on business and am looking to get together with couples at my hotel in the evenings. I am looking specifically for couples with cuckold fantasies and for couples with experience.

Like many submissive men who are in relationships that are open, I have fantasies of Madame cuckolding me. In fact, it happened just a week or so before I saw this ad. Madame had spent some time with a dominant man who took her to dinner, they then had some consensual BDSM play and he fucked her thoroughly. Madame had returned from that visit the next morning and by the time I saw her had not showered since the last bout of fucking so she used that against me as I kissed her body in our bed. “Can you taste his cock, pup? Can you taste his cum?”

I’m pretty confident that she didn’t actually take his cum inside her, but I’m not sure. And while we generally play safely, it is her prerogative to do what she wants if she is with another man. If that means letting him fill her with cum, then that is how it will be.

Back to present day… I forwarded the ad from Craigslist to Madame. At this point, I hadn’t seen the picture that was associated with the ad, just the text. Turns out my Craigslist app wasn’t providing pictures. Later I looked up the ad at home as Mistress was writing an email to this bull. That’s when I saw the man’s very long straight cock. It was certainly longer than mine, but not necessarily thicker. I commented to Madame that I was just now seeing the picture and she commented “I know that cock will make you gag” and smiled widely at me. “I can’t wait to hear you choking on it.”

She sent the reply and, as it was a late notice thing, we had to end up trying to keep current schedules open to accommodate the bull and his cock and his desire to fuck my Mistress – and maybe me.

It’s very difficult to find sane, clean men that want to play with a couple like us. We’ve tried a few times but only really found one connection so far. Madame has found some men to play with her, but we’ve only incorporated one Craigslist find into our combined world.

So, to move from the dearth of Craigslist finds to actually replying to someone about a possible bull and cuckold situation – that’s quite a leap for us. It’s very exciting. Chloe knows I would be happy to watch her and/or participate, but I think she’s been trying to see if it’s fantasy or reality from my mind. And it’s absolutely reality that I want to see my Mistress pleasured by someone else. Whether that’s a cuckolding situation for me remains to be seen if she’s up for that, but I think that it really has moved into a wanted reality. We shall have to see. In the meantime, I’ve asked “Should I keep searching?” and she has given her approval to continue looking.

We did not hear back from him in time. Perhaps he was booked up already, perhaps he didn’t like the pictures we sent. Perhaps he was just a picture collector. But we did send a reply and Madame certainly made moves to make this happen. And now I think I’ll have a little more idle time in that same chair tomorrow. So perhaps I’ll have another chance to search.