Locked and Splayed

chastity lock

This is the text I got two minutes ago:

“Does it make you smile knowing that your boy is driving around the state, locked up for you?”

I got this from john, of course. Not that I would mind having another boy or 10 driving around the state locked in a steel chastity chastity device. Hell, I would get off on knowing that every single man out there walked around in a metal tube and lock, but that’s just me. Every time I see another woman walking around with a key dangling from a necklace from her neck, I smile a secret smile…..sometimes outwardly, sometimes privately because I am guessing that often times this is just a fashion statement that has nothing to do with chastity. Maybe…..but maybe not.  A dreamer can dream, right?

But to answer the question (I told him he’d have to wait for this post in order to find out), my reply is Yes, of course. Of course it makes me smile. But I smile at a lot of things regarding us. I do wonder, though…..do you think, pup, that you being locked in chastity becomes old?  Do you fear that one day I won’t smile as brightly?  That your chastity becomes something that is so routine that I stop being aware of it? To answer, it is not anything at all I’d ever tire of.  Ever. I found you last night, splayed out on top of our bed, completely naked, except for the shiny metal upon your cock and wrist. Your smile was splayed too, and the moment I see you, everything about you seems and feels right. I will never in a million years tire of such a thing….at the sight and knowledge of you.

Keuschheitskäfig_zI like the noise of this new cage. It clinks and clangs in a way that is different than the other devices, and I like it. I am guessing that a stranger or coworker would assume the noise has something to do with loose things in your pocket, but I know better. Oh….I know better.

We are in a quiet pattern in our kink. I won’t go as far as to say season, because seasons last months on end. And in Maine, winter is about 6 months long. So, I’ll call it patterns, much like a weather pattern that tends to last weeks and not months. Stormy outside yes, but quiet and peaceful on the inside. I feel a sense of contentment, but know that you crave more. I never, ever forget that you are my kinky, subservient, obedient, service-focused, collared, disciplined, owned, sexy boy. But I do sometimes omit from your diet the daily dose of kink that fortifies you. You are so easy to tend to, and you take such obvious joy and pleasure from chastity and restraint. When you lock yourself up as you do, and I am wearing that key, it’s a  strong bond between us. Another bond we share. I feel this sense of privilege knowing that I hold your key, knowing that you do this for the love of Me, for the love of our dynamic, for the love of the feeling you get. You don’t need a cage on that cock of yours to know and feel that you are owned, but it certainly adds to it.

So, when you ask if it makes me smile, the answer is a resounding, full-bodied, complete and utter Yes. It makes me smile in pleasure. In wickedness. In pride. In joy. In sadism.

In totality.



She goes to shows sometimes. This night, she headed to a show she has seen before, with a man who has bought her tickets before, who stands zero chance of getting into her pants, but is a good friend. And yet, I get a text like this from her and I am aroused and intrigued.

she tells strangers

she tells strangers

Indeed, she wore the key tonight, while I’ve been locked up for several days, including during this mornings parking lot orgasm thing… and yet she wears the key out with another man at another show where she’ll twirl and dance and enjoy the evening… while I am home packing up for our week long camp adventure. And I am perfectly fine with that. In fact, I want to know more about what she told strangers! It stands to be an awesome story!

I do enjoy being locked for her. And I look forward to being unlocked by her, but texts like this often can lead to other fantasies… and I’ll, perhaps, need to write about those ideas too! :)

And yes, my nickname for Chloe in my phone is “My Lover” – because we are just that to many others. Boyfriend, girlfriend, but I have, in the context of others, called her my lover and even corrected people who say “Your wife” with “Oh, no, sorry, she’s my lover.”

We’re not quite at the point where I’m telling them “No, I’m her plaything. Her submissive. She’s my Mistress and owner” but we are making some progress.

I also like how I can ask my phone “Locate my lover” and it’ll find out where she is. That’s a lovely feature. ;)

Waving and welcoming




I like the two chains; one for each boy.

Well, my pup has hit the road late last night. South he goes, headed to the winter kink event that packs thousands of people in one big hotel for a long weekend. He is driving about 10 hours south of Maine and yet the weather is supposed to be frigid. He works the weekend (ok, volunteers is a more accurate word). I don’t envy him when it is this cold. I know what it is like. For many years, we have done and worked this event together, but not this time. My job gets in the way this year, so he goes as our representative. I will miss him and miss all the kinky delights that I know will take place. But, I am working on my delights, so there is definitely that to look forward to.

John will play as both top and bottom, and I like that he will get to do both. The lovely southern area ‘Lady” will help look after him for Me, and he will spend part of the weekend in perfect service to Her. I like hearing the stories when he serves her. I think she holds him to a very high standard, which I like. And she can be a bit of a sadist. Which I love.

My boy is going with a bit of a new look. Normally, I would consider him a very well manicured man. Right now, he is still that way, with a bit of “Sons of Anarchy” thrown in. I will be curious to learn if his looks influence his play in any way. I grin thinking about it.

I was a little verklempt  seeing him packing up all the toys, though. I would have loved to have gone with him, bringing with us my toy troy (yes, he officially has a name). I think it would have blown troy’s mind to be there, in a good way. I had fantasies about that. I am hoping that troy can accompany us for the summer event we will be going to.

Speaking of troy, I am spending our first significant chunk of time with him this coming week. He opted not to go away on a guys weekend this weekend, so I get V-day with one of the two boys, and that is very nice.  I am not a big Hallmark holiday kind of person, but still, it will nice to not spend it alone. At least the ‘breakfast in bed’ part. :-)

I am really, really looking forward to this time with him. It will include training, yes. I want him to know what I like, how I like it, etc. But I also want hang out time with him. Exploring time with him. I want to continue to learn about his body and his mind. I want to groom him in this service that I love. And I really like the idea of being at his place. I know he will be most comfortable there, and I want that for him. I think he will feel more confident this way, and that will work nicely as I perhaps put him through a few paces that make him nervous. In the best of ways, of course.

Saturday has me going to the Fetish Flea with a vanilla girlfriend who knows all about our lives, all about what we enjoy. I am most excited for this! She is an absolute treasure of a friend, and I know she will love the experience, if not for the shoes and shopping alone! Troy is providing a lovely service for us. I asked him to create a road trip cooler for us, as the last time I went to his event, it took nearly 3 hours at the hotel bar to get a simple burger. This year, I am being smarter and from what troy tells me, he is doing a fabulous job of creating something simple and elegant for us….just the way I like it.

So, that’s the update for now. Lots going on despite the cold and dark that keeps most indoors. Time for me to go pack up a few things I will need for the days I am with troy. I’ll start with all things leather and steel first……


Catching up and Inspecting

Sometimes I find out more about what my boy has been up to by reading this blog than by talking with him. I smile broadly as I write this, knowing that john is not a huge talker, but oh, how he loves to write about details sometimes!!!

I am back from my trip, and I am glad to read all he has posted in my absence. I was quite surprised to learn about his medical issue, and all that transpired and lead to the removal of his cock cage that I ordered to be in place. I know it must have been substantial if it caused him to break through a lock. And it was.

I am glad he is ok. I think we have learned from this. Learned more about our bodies and how some of the play we do impacts us.

I have not yet inspected the chores he was ordered to complete. I got home at about 10:30pm last night, and didn’t do anything other than to fall into bed after 13 hours of travel.

I agree with john; we need to talk about how we refer to others in this blog. In general, I don’t like to name names of other people or places, as identifying those things has little to do with the purpose of writing. I spent a good deal of time texting with the woman he was going to go see last night, as I was just getting caught up on the medical stuff that prevented him from seeing her.  I am disappointed for both of them that their date could not take place. I enjoy placing john in this woman’s very capable hands, and I want to write about this part of our relationship and our occasional group dynamics.  I will do that. Just not today. Today, I need to get caught up, I need to get in the shower and get the salty gulf waters out of my hair (oh, how I don’t want to!). I need to head into the office and then I need to come home and spent time with my boy, making sure he is healing.

I also need to thoroughly inspect the chore list I left for him while I was away. He knows that certain pieces of furniture are his responsibility to be kept dust free (or relatively so). One quick look around tells me that he might be slacking in this department, but other than that, I am feeling pleased at all he accomplished.4383468427_298da33807_z

I also need to start meeting the few I want to meet from my “ISO” post. I very select few have piqued my curiosity, and now its about setting up coffee/beer dates. Will I like them? Will they like me?? Will they want to be a part of our world to varying degrees? Will they be willing to serve and play as I seek?? We shall see. The hunt continues. Stay tuned.



I haven’t really discussed chastity that much on the blog, but then, I haven’t been locked up that often. But that just means I haven’t been away from Madame! As you’ve read, she is away this weekend, thus, I am locked up.

We’re using a Steelworxx device, from Germany, not to be confused with the Canadian manufacturer of a similar name. ;) It’s a custom made device, one of the common “captive ball” devices that has an a-ring and a tube. Most importantly, ours is powder coated to keep my contact with metal minimized, as I have an allergy to some metals, likely nickel. I’ve had this device recoated (powder coat) once, as the padlocked scraped up the tube and the edges of the tube also became dinged, revealing metal. The powder coating pros where I had it redone were not impressed with the original coating job, but did the recoat even if they were pretty sure they didn’t want to know EXACTLY what it was used for. Smart guys.

Let me just discuss how it feels and I feel in it.

Physically, it makes my scrotum stretch. The primary discomfort I feel is under my sack where the skin is often scrumped up under there to fit through the tube. I will regularly lubricate that spot with coconut oil or lotion. I sometimes have to pop into the bathroom at work to do this. After that, it’s good for a few hours. The penis, well, I pretty much don’t notice it in there at all. It becomes invisible to me, as if I don’t have a cock. I sit to pee, unless I’m in the woods or wearing a kilt, in which case I can stand or squat, depending on the surroundings.

Mentally, I have some of the following feelings. At the same time I’m feeling the grip of the a-ring around my balls it feels in my head like it’s the grip of my Mistress around my cock and balls. She squeezes me harder in person sometimes, but still, I do feel her squeezing me. Several times a night during the first stages of a lockup, I’ll awaken with a hard-on that won’t quit, causing me to either get up to go to the bathroom or to kneel next to the bed until the erection subsides. The erections have my cock filling the tube and more, pulling my balls away from my body. It’s a kind of self induced CBT session, as my balls are painfully pulled away. The hydraulics of the situation prevent any other outcome. I’m sure that Madame is happy that I’m being tortured this way while we are apart.

I also don’t see my cock, as mentioned before. That part, in a way, is emasculating to me. To be honest, since I don’t feel the tube on the penis, and I don’t see my cock, because it’s entirely enclosed, it’s often as though I do not have a cock at all. And that’s a strong mental head game.

Right now, I’m at two days in lock up, which I place on the calendar, as Madame likes to know how often I’ve been locked. It’s been a light year, especially in comparison to some other bloggers who are 90%+ locked! There was a time, when I was married, where I was locked with some remote guidance where I was locked 122 days, but that’s not been a number we’ve been close to with us. Madame simply enjoys fucking too much to go without me! Lucky dog, I am!

I also think, as she has hinted at times, that one of the more “cage like” CB’s might be a suitable change in direction. Mentally, I think she would enjoy the idea of locking up her cock and being able to see it while it’s locked. I think she doesn’t like that her cock disappears into this big black tube when she locks me. Perhaps being able to see her cock might be beneficial. I’ve been interested in exploring other devices, but who has $300 to drop on another chastity tube?

So, I am locked, two days now. I expect release today, but am not sure. Then, while Madame disappears on another adventure, I’m expecting that I’ll be locked again, this time for a much longer duration. We shall see.

Right now, I’m in those early days. I’m not depressed. I’m happy. I feel it very intensely in my mind, heart and cock and look forward to her releasing me today! And then it’ll be reunion time! :) We’ll see how things pan out during the coming adventures and I’ll report back should there be longer lockup times as to how I’m feeling mentally and physically.

It hangs from a chain

As is becoming customary these days, I was locked up while I was away from her this weekend. I presented her cock to her Friday morning, already in the tube and simply waiting for the placement of the lock and the “click” that would secure her property while it went on a weekend away with family. Monday morning I received from her one of the most erotic images I’ve ever received from her.

Her key

Her key hangs from a chain

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