Been a long time…

Its been a long time since I blogged here. I tend to do that. Go for long spells where I fail to write and then write a whole lot. It can be tedious for the reader and it certainly does gain a loyal following, but it’s how my life is.

I could talk about work and its stresses and demands. I could talk about home life and how its going mostly well, but my world as a “Dad” might be stressed more than I expected it could be. I could discuss my kink, which is going well. And I could discuss my female led relationship, which is also going well. But to pick out a few things might make them seem more “important” or “impactful” than others and I don’t want to annoy or upset anyone by doing that.

But in essence, I kind of need to do that. Instead of writing “all the things!” I’m going to need to pick out a few things here and there and expound on them as regularly as I can. And if I’m including people in the conversations, then they’ll need to know that I’m dancing ^W writing as fast as I can and will get to all the things, eventually.

And no, it’s not a NaNoWriMo type thing inspiring the writing that I need to do, but I do think that there are times when putting pen to paper (or hands to keys) can be a useful exercise in working things out. It’s much like the technical technique of “confessional debugging” – where you explain the problem to someone else, what debugging steps you’ve tried and more often than not, just in the process of explaining it this way and the person you’re explaining to mostly listening, you can discover the problem on your own. It really works well! So, perhaps my confessional debugging of writing will help all of me and in the process help me find some peace of mind with all the things in my head. At my core, I am happy, but a few important things make me feel stressed and not entirely whole. So I’ll do what I can to bring some of that to the fore and see where I can make improvements. So, let’s hope for more writing from me soon!

Manic depressive

Okay, so that’s a misleading title, I know.  I am not Manic Depressive in a clinical sense but I’m being forced through it. Manic because work these days; due to ‘changes’ and the world environment, is manic, moving me from project A to B to C and back again in myriad combinations. I’m okay with that, to an extent, but it’s quickly ramping up to be a continuing manic state the next two months. And the head of technology just threw down some more changes which not just change assumptions about the aforementioned projects, but change the workload drastically.

Now, on the depression side, I realized a couple days ago I was getting depressed. It’s because Chloe is away and has been for a week or so. She comes back today. It’s not a big depression, but I know it’s there. My eating habits changed, my sleep schedule is completely fucked and despite the loss of 2 pounds over the previous week, I’m back up again having gained that 2 pounds back. WTF body?! Damn it!

So, the depressed part should get better once she gets back. Sleeping next to her is far more comfortable than without. We fit together so well in bed. Sometimes we spoon and sleep that way for hours without moving.

So, I go from being the sad dog face to manic employee and back again all. day. long. And for days at a time.

I have to say, I’m looking forward to spring and warmer temperatures. And more sunshine. But for now, I’ll just keep Marching through (see what I did there?) and get to April, where the work schedule will continue to ramp up, at least until May 9 when “Things Happen” at the day job.

I’m very much looking forward to the collar, the leash and the Mistress all being back in place where they belong tonight.