Lockdown

I haven’t really discussed chastity that much on the blog, but then, I haven’t been locked up that often. But that just means I haven’t been away from Madame! As you’ve read, she is away this weekend, thus, I am locked up.

We’re using a Steelworxx device, from Germany, not to be confused with the Canadian manufacturer of a similar name. ;) It’s a custom made device, one of the common “captive ball” devices that has an a-ring and a tube. Most importantly, ours is powder coated to keep my contact with metal minimized, as I have an allergy to some metals, likely nickel. I’ve had this device recoated (powder coat) once, as the padlocked scraped up the tube and the edges of the tube also became dinged, revealing metal. The powder coating pros where I had it redone were not impressed with the original coating job, but did the recoat even if they were pretty sure they didn’t want to know EXACTLY what it was used for. Smart guys.

Let me just discuss how it feels and I feel in it.

Physically, it makes my scrotum stretch. The primary discomfort I feel is under my sack where the skin is often scrumped up under there to fit through the tube. I will regularly lubricate that spot with coconut oil or lotion. I sometimes have to pop into the bathroom at work to do this. After that, it’s good for a few hours. The penis, well, I pretty much don’t notice it in there at all. It becomes invisible to me, as if I don’t have a cock. I sit to pee, unless I’m in the woods or wearing a kilt, in which case I can stand or squat, depending on the surroundings.

Mentally, I have some of the following feelings. At the same time I’m feeling the grip of the a-ring around my balls it feels in my head like it’s the grip of my Mistress around my cock and balls. She squeezes me harder in person sometimes, but still, I do feel her squeezing me. Several times a night during the first stages of a lockup, I’ll awaken with a hard-on that won’t quit, causing me to either get up to go to the bathroom or to kneel next to the bed until the erection subsides. The erections have my cock filling the tube and more, pulling my balls away from my body. It’s a kind of self induced CBT session, as my balls are painfully pulled away. The hydraulics of the situation prevent any other outcome. I’m sure that Madame is happy that I’m being tortured this way while we are apart.

I also don’t see my cock, as mentioned before. That part, in a way, is emasculating to me. To be honest, since I don’t feel the tube on the penis, and I don’t see my cock, because it’s entirely enclosed, it’s often as though I do not have a cock at all. And that’s a strong mental head game.

Right now, I’m at two days in lock up, which I place on the calendar, as Madame likes to know how often I’ve been locked. It’s been a light year, especially in comparison to some other bloggers who are 90%+ locked! There was a time, when I was married, where I was locked with some remote guidance where I was locked 122 days, but that’s not been a number we’ve been close to with us. Madame simply enjoys fucking too much to go without me! Lucky dog, I am!

I also think, as she has hinted at times, that one of the more “cage like” CB’s might be a suitable change in direction. Mentally, I think she would enjoy the idea of locking up her cock and being able to see it while it’s locked. I think she doesn’t like that her cock disappears into this big black tube when she locks me. Perhaps being able to see her cock might be beneficial. I’ve been interested in exploring other devices, but who has $300 to drop on another chastity tube?

So, I am locked, two days now. I expect release today, but am not sure. Then, while Madame disappears on another adventure, I’m expecting that I’ll be locked again, this time for a much longer duration. We shall see.

Right now, I’m in those early days. I’m not depressed. I’m happy. I feel it very intensely in my mind, heart and cock and look forward to her releasing me today! And then it’ll be reunion time! :) We’ll see how things pan out during the coming adventures and I’ll report back should there be longer lockup times as to how I’m feeling mentally and physically.